Watching I Heart Robots makes me feel like I might as well be watching a porn that is playing on low resolution or rather was designed that way on purpose for cheap ad revenue from Tubi. Justin Price directed this film in which Franzi-Schissler plays the lead character Terra, an inhabitant of the futuristic world of a robot apocalypse and occasionally converses with her friend Jess (Lela Gruber) via radio. The Terra must traverse the north with her robot Q for some purpose that might revolve around saving the world or some shit deep in the future or civilization, don’t ask me either.
In the storyline, it seems to be the norm and Terra has to wear a ‘stylish’ clothing, which is nonsensical in terms any scenario where the world is in ruins, and go travel wherever along with her obnoxious robot who Q has many characteristics of. The purpose of Q is that of an irritating conversation levee stuck in a permanently annoying Microsoft Sam voice. They have some run ins on their journey with damaged robots which movie states are structurally unstable as the entire human race disarmed itself a long time ago and relied on the Robots to fight all battles. This explains how unleashing a single shot from a pistol capable of bringing down a monstrous robot, however these also obliterated entire races.
This film serves as a stupendous example for emerging first time directors. 90% of Q the robot’s presence on screen is wasted because the director and CG guys on the film decided to mess with it instead of the other way around. If you know the robots are going to come over looking stupid with their feets slapping around, then don’t show their feet where they just slide across the ground. Wouldn’t many scenes in this film have improved with a dull, unmoving camera, and complete blackness? There are a few times in the film where the robots are shot from low angles and are supposedly designed to be awe inspiring. Why do all the side angles suck when using an over the shoulder view, where nobody even sees the robot’s pounds standing on something?
I mean, even those shadowy edges makes the picture so much more appealing place. Why do the sceneries with the robot’s focus make more sense if they’re not well lit? It covers flaws and increases the nerves of the audience. And that is why there are no things like Resident Evil playing at noon.
In this case if you have the slightest knowledge of English or do not know how to plan the script, try to keep the dialogues of the characters to the bare minimum. The film is set in the world after an apocalypse, the focus shifts to silence in the film as long shots of the scene add and create the right feeling. There is way too much chatter in this film, and the only one who seems to be pulling it off is the director Justin Price for reasons that are hard to comprehend. It is so clear you can tell actors had very little scene instructions at all or none. The scenes comprise of numerous flashbacks and dream interludes to an extent that the movie seems rather long with little action to follow.
You can tell this movie has a lot of heart put into it but at the same time it must be noted it is not a good one. Most of the actors are unbearably bad. There are good number of scenes featuring Danny Trejo and he completely confounds the viewer with his lines. I wish Justin Price directed more horror flicks because I think if he gets a bit of experience he will do well in the genre. Like the new Scott Cawthon but rather with movies instead of games.
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